I have a unique situation—unique to me, probably more common than my little world has allowed in my experience. But is unique to me all the same. In the midst of my mid-life (one can only hope) my family and I decided to fulfill my lifelong dream of moving to the shore. In my then life, I had a good job; friends and family near by and with all that combined it could not quell the loud cries of my broken heart more than the ocean could. The loss of my Mother was a life game changer for me; one I could have never prepared for…I however in hindsight wished for years to prepare; in reality I had only 8 months. In that 8 months I was not thinking about what my life would consist of without her as she was the sum total focus and that monumentous undertaking could come later. And that it did.
Fast forward my family and I have made the move, all the right doors opened and we found the location of our dreams. Bought our current home, sold my beloved home of 27 years and the dream begins. Finding a job will be easy she thinks, she has a college degree; graduating 1st in her class with a perfect GPA. She has 3+ years each of experience in different employment venues that provided a range of transferable skills. She has written a book, self-taught herself how to design & manage a website empowering people to live their best lives. Finding a job easily became a misnomer very quickly.
From here I will go rather quickly as your time is valuable. I have never been one to think about dulling my shine. My motto is: you are the only you, you will ever have. Why on earth would I betray myself? I can say I have been very fortunate to open doors and get interviews on this search with my resume alone. In the past my search definitely consisted more of having a great network around me, which led to employment opportunities. Out here on an island or shall I say peninsula, I am the lone ranger in my search. My first interview was for two positions with a panel of 3 interviewers; one male and 2 female. I immediately connected with 2 of the 3, the 3rd I knew right away my shine was a little too much for. In the midst of the interview which lasted well over 90 minutes it kept coming back from this particular interviewer to control. The subtext was can I be controlled? Mind you this was a very entry to mid-level position. I was of no threat to this interviewer but then it got me thinking—was I? Did I shine too bright?
Another interview for a very entry-level position focused not on the job I was applying for but rather on the book I wrote and the blog about human empowerment I run. The interview went great but because I wrote a book and run a website and know how to cook, educate on finances, health and a whole bevy of subjects I was overqualified for a job I had previously done for 6 years. My shine was to bright?
Don’t get me started on another interview I had where you wonder how the interviewer ever reached their position in the first place. It was also at the first company I interviewed for; so maybe I am detecting a pattern and should say thank you God for closing that door—twice.
At this point I am rethinking every strategy I have had up until now. I turn to my husband and trusted advisor friends for guidance. My husband, who turns out is my number one fan, has offered to go on interviews for me and as he puts it: will let them know about his wife and all she is capable of. My trusted advisors and I surmise—maybe I should dull my shine. Remove from my resume all of my accomplishments with writing a book and developing a website and pretend to be less than. Less than to obtain an entry-level position. Hmmmm?
So I started to do just that, revamp my resume to dull my shine & accomplishments just in case others who I might interview with who don’t have the same accomplishments will feel good. That’s a long sentence but breaking it up just didn’t seem to have the same impact as I read it over and over and over again. I started to think back on all of the doors that opened for me over the years. In some of the best roles I have ever held, I was always myself; what you see is what you get. And what you get is a hard-working individual who truly cares for the people they work for and with. What you get is an individual who will do battle whenever there is an injustice that needs to be corrected. What you get is an educated, worldly, accomplished Woman of many trades, master of some. What you get is the individual who was put on this Earth not to dull but to shine. Please wait for those doors to open as it is only when we can be ourselves that our shine illuminates the way for others to shine just as brightly.
DULLING YOUR SHINE? PLEASE STOP!
Featured Image Photo by Julia Caesar on Unsplash
Kimberly
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