When You Fall Out Of Friendship – WOMAN MARKET READY

Updated: 8/21/21

Though this article was originally written on precedented falling out of friendship(s), a recent, very impactful one has necessitated the update.

In addition to the above, this text I received from a very old friend contributed to my emerging new thoughts about the subject. The text read: This is why I ❤️ you!! & this is what TRUE FRIENDSHIP IS… even though we don’t talk or see each other nearly enough as I’d like…. I can pick up the phone at any given time & call you about nonsense!! & we can still laugh together about things!!😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

I have bolded the changes but the main first print is still very much intact.

So many articles have been written about when you fall out of love with someone, but what about when you fall out of friendship?!

Recently, I was with two great friends, one whom I have been friends with for the better part of 4 decades, the other I have known for about 10 years but became very close with in the last 5 or so years. We talked about this very subject in great length and I was happy to have the unique perspectives of these two friendships with their different lengths, time wise to compare and contrast with our views on the subject that I can share with you.

I have since added the wisdom of a very old soul, who is young in years, that I now have the privilege of their valuable input on this subject as well as many meaningful life ones, on the daily.

This quote from Dr. Wayne Dyer started this dialogue in my mind some time ago:

Falling out of friendship, in my experiences, has included friendship in marriage as well as friendship with women and men alike. As I get older and especially going through the loss of my Mother, I started examining friendship of all kinds with different perspectives. I realized that you can love someone without friendship but you can not have a relationship without it. Friendship isn’t about how much time you have known someone, or experiences that you have shared, it is about wanting to be in someone else’s life and company and enjoy doing so. There simply isn’t any room in this oh so brief life for anything less than.

Wanting to be in someone else’s life and company and enjoy doing so. Wanting to be in someone else’s life but maybe not considering—they may not want to be in yours. The ego & heart are fickle beings. They work in tandem. The ego in order to protect the heart may ask: why would anyone not want to spend time with me? You start to protect yourself even more with rationalizing; “I am funny, smart, talented, why would anyone not want to spend time with me?” It’s a circle you go round and round with sometimes for years and well beyond the time that you should have let the relationship simply run its course and fall. The hardest thing to realize when the ego runs the show is that maybe the reason you don’t want to spend time with others are the very same reasons others may not want to spend time with you. As I stated prior, you can love someone without friendship but you cannot have a relationship without it. Maybe it is the love that keeps you tethered? Tethered to the idea that all relationships should last forever when we should maybe realize that some friendships have shelve lives and they went on one-sided, well past the expiration date. Think about it and love yourself enough to let those relationships finally fall. Free yourself. I shudder when I think about all the time I wasted on one-sided relationships while my ego ran the show. Shudder! I repeat—free yourself.

Of course, this is just this one woman’s humble opinion, derived from a collaboration of thought, but I want you to maybe start to examine the friendships you are in and ask yourself: do they enrich my life; do I enrich theirs; do I enjoy spending time with them; do they enjoy spending time with me?

If you answered no to any of the above questions, I leave you with one last thought. The world is filled with billions of people, certainly there are many people who would answer yes when thinking about you. Stop wasting time and go find them. ❌⭕️❌⭕️

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Kimberly

Author; Blogger; Self-Proclaimed “Woman” of all trades and Self-Proclaimed “Master” of some! AFAA Certified Group Aerobics Instructor since 1998; MA Licensed Real Estate Agent since 1995; former Certified Financial Counselor and Passionate Advocator of Financial Education for Women. Tech Geek; Home Cook & Most Importantly, Mother of 3, my #1 Reason for Living!!!